I Was Adopted

The sometimes horrific or grossly exaggerated ideas of what it means to be adopted can make hearing someone say, "I was adopted" uncomfortable. People may automatically begin to assume they understand you've had a tough life full of neglect, abuse, drugs, or what have you.

These are, of course, overstatements for the general adopted population. Many children who were adopted as infants do not even know their birth mother and have had lives completely influenced by their environment with the few genetic exceptions and personality traits that may shine through from their biological identity. Children who were adopted at an older age from a foster home or institution are more likely than their peers to have anxiety, depression or attention disorders. However, it would be unfair to assume that it applies to all foster adoptees or adopted children in general.

Being an adoptee certainly has its tough moments, particularly around those who seem insensitive to the adoption community out of ignorance. This is probably something that transracial and transethnic families are confronted with more often. And while these pressures or strange questions may arise, one's openness is only as necessary as one feels comfortable with. Forming an identity that neglects one's role as an adoptee is impossible, but embracing it and finding others who understand the difficulties that can present is becoming easier and easier in today's society. With over 10 million adult adoptees and over 1.5 million child adoptees in America, the community is continuing to grow faster and faster. Although the next time you say, "I was adopted," you may not hear an understanding "Me too," you may receive something other than a look of sympathy or confusion.