Finding Adopted Children

The process of finding adopted children as a birth relative looking for a reunion or meeting or to notify the child of possible health concerns is slightly more difficult than the process of an adoptee looking for a birth relative.

There are a few different routes a searching birth relative can take to find an adoptee. First, birth relatives can register with the state registry in which the adoption was finalized. After registering with the state, the registrants will be contacted if another member of the adoption triad mutually consents to establish contact or releasing the adoption record. After registering with the state, the registrant can also petition the courts to have a confidential intermediary appointed to their case. The C.I. will have access to the adoption record and can conduct a search and facilitate contact between the adoption parties.

Birth parents and adoptees can also go to the agency through which an adoption was facilitated and ask about post-adoption search services. These may have fees and legal hurdles, but are worth a try. There are other active ways to search, such as database registries online. Birth relatives can register and look through the lists of other registrants in hopes of finding adopted children who are also searching within the database and are a potential match.

The search process can be emotionally and financially draining. Be sure to find some kind of support group, either in-person or online in a forum or birth relative community, to help in the event of a failed search or refused contact.